Writing Prompt: Falling From 12,000 Feet
You’ve signed up to go tandem skydiving for the first time. On the plane, your instructor says he isn’t feeling well, but jumps with you anyway. When you jump, he passes out. Write this scene and the stream of conscious thoughts as you fall towards the earth.
Great, the one time I decide to do something out of my comfort zone, this happens. I have pretty much fast coursed my way to my death. Falling, so much falling, and this dude on my back will not even know when we hit the ground. This should be the other way around. I should be the one passed out and he should be the one awake, saving us in time before we go splat on the ground.
Let’s go skydiving, my brother, Robert, said. It will be great, he said. If I am still alive after this, I will hug him so tight and tell him how much I love him. Then, I will choke him.
Hey! You guys to the left of me – can you not hear me screaming? Can you not see the fear on my face and the frantic waving of my arms? CAN YOU NOT SEE THE LIMP DUDE ON MY BACK?
Oh god – I am going to die. I will never see my family again. No more late night phone calls to my mom to tell her about the silly dreams I have. No more weekly bookstore trips and coffee dates with my brother. No more concerts and camping with my dad. I am not ready to leave them. They are all I have in this world. Whenever I need them, they are always there. No! I am not ready to die. There is too much in life I have not done or seen. Oh no . . . this is it, isn’t it?. Mom, Dad, Robert – I love you. I love you. I love you.
OW! What in the world was that? Why do I feel like I have been yanked? Am I dead? Is that how it feels when you ascend up to heaven? No, that’s not it. The dude! He woke up! So, does this mean I will not die today? Oh my goodness – I am so happy I could pee myself! Uh, well, too late for that, since I have already accomplished that task. Never in my life have I wanted to touch the ground as much as I do right now. The first thing I will do when we land is hug the ground. Then, I will hug the dude, make sure he is ok, and tell him he needs to retire from this gig. Lastly, I will hug my brother . . . and kindly knee him in the balls.
My Thoughts on the Story:
I really don’t like this one as much as I thought I did. I was trying to make it comical, but I’m not sure if this came out the way I wanted to. I liked the whole idea of trying to figure out what would be the last things your character would think about if they were in the midst of possibly falling to their death. I think I could have been a little bit more serious, and I also should taken the time to set up the story a little bit more. Like I mentioned before, writing 500 words or less, and trying to set up a story that makes sense, is not that easy.
Let me know what you think I should have done. I read another post of someone who kind of went in the same direction as me, and I must say, their story was pretty good. Just saying :-)